31 Days of BPD
Shopping is my biggest weakness when it comes to impulsivity. I spend whatever money I have on anything. Clothes, shoes, jewellery, furniture, food. Both for myself, and I become incredibly generous with presents for other people. I don’t have an off button. I stop when my card gets rejected as I’ve reached my overdraft limit.
If I know getting that new dress will mean I don’t eat for the next week, the dress will still happen.
I don’t think I’m particularly impulsive in any other area. Other than when I’m hypomanic and the business plans start. This is probably more to do with my Cyclothymia rather than BPD though. The business plans come together quickly and then the money on the new business gets spent in minutes.
It’s something I’ve tried to control a lot over the years. I’ve given money to mum to look after or put it into different accounts, but nothing makes a difference. I end up needing it all back half way through the month as I realise I don’t have enough to live.
I will conquer it eventually though; I’m determined!